Overheard at Senior Homes (Part 4)

A resident in my senior art class displaying her linocut prints.

I teach writing and printmaking classes at senior homes in Los Angeles. Over the years, I’ve kept a journal of the memorable things I’ve seen and heard.

At a Tarzana senior home, I met a couple in their eighties who were engaged to be married. Both had recently lost spouses and met in a grieving group. They scheduled a wedding ceremony at the community and invited all the residents to attend. Esther (the bride), created a registry to help people select wedding gifts. Rather than registering at Nordstroms or Crate & Barrel, she opted for CVS Drugstore. She showed me the list of gifts. They included adult diapers, Efferdent, Metamucil, orthotic shoes, diabetes medication, an aluminum walker, shower chair, blood pressure monitor, bedside commode and Viagra.

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A man in a Sherman Oaks senior home told me he’d made a living as a burglar alarm salesman. I asked the key to his success. “Two words,” he said. “Charles Manson.” He explained that in the late sixties the only people who bought burglar alarms were the ultra rich and celebrities. “I sold a few burglar alarms a month, barely enough to survive. Then Charles Manson came around and sales shot through the roof. The most popular Christmas gift in 1969 was a home burglar alarm system. People in the industry joked we should give Mr. Manson a man of the year award.”